While it might seem like the last thing you want to do — or have time for — on overwhelming, busy days, keeping up self-care routines is important on these days, too. We start to feel stressed because our activity levels (what we’re doing) surpass our energy levels, Vermani explains — and self-care is all the things you do to fill your cup and replenish those energy levels.
Maybe it’s a walk outside, cooking a nourishing dinner, writing in a gratitude journal, or dancing to pop music. These can all be things that help you recharge your energy, Sandiford adds. “Remember that if you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else.”
Include an element of joy in daily activities; something that brings you pleasure and interest, and keeps you connected to yourself.
Whether you categorize it as “fun” or “self-care,” engaging in any pursuit that you love and are confident in will relieve stress, Sandiford says. Running, biking, walking in nature, listening to music, and painting are among her personal favorites, and she sets aside at least 15 minutes per day for one of those activities — especially on days she predicts will be challenging ones.
When stressed, Vermani notices that she can go an entire day taking only shallow breaths. So she sets a reminder in her calendar between clients to pause and take deep, nourishing breaths. It’s a good daily habit, but it’s especially important on the days when stress levels rise, she says.
You might try taking a few full, gentle breaths in for a count of 4, and exhaling slowly for a count of 6; then just notice how you feel. This style of paced, deep breathing calms the sympathetic, or fight-or-flight, nervous system, which helps the body feel less anxious in the moment, research finds.
Ruminating thoughts of being unable or incapable of managing a situation causes stress, Vermani says. To counteract rumination and turn the stress response down, she repeats a positive affirmation — some call this a mantra — to encourage feelings of being capable and able to manage the demands of the day.
When you know a day may be stressful, start it off from a place of strength by repeating one of these affirmations first thing in the morning.
Ruminating thoughts of being unable or incapable of managing a situation causes stress, Vermani says. To counteract rumination and turn the stress response down, she repeats a positive affirmation — some call this a mantra — to encourage feelings of being capable and able to manage the demands of the day.
When you know a day may be stressful, start it off from a place of strength by repeating one of these affirmations first thing in the morning.
When you know a day may be stressful, start it off from a place of strength by repeating one of these affirmations first thing in the morning.
Haley Perlus, PhD, a sport and performance psychologist in Denver, likes to practice deep belly breathing when she finds herself in stressful situations. She puts her hands on her belly and takes a slow, deep breath in and out.
“When I breathe in, I focus on feeling my stomach expand. When I breathe out, I feel my stomach contract. I like to remember: control my breath, control my stress. This brings me back to center and momentarily distracts me from the stressor and brings me to a place of perceived control both in my mind and body,” Dr. Perlus says.
Mind-body relaxation techniques are among the best stress busters, Perlus says. And many you can practice in just a minute (or a few) whenever, wherever you feel overwhelmed.
When she has a full five minutes, Perlus says she likes to find a quiet spot to lie down, breathe deeply, and try to clear her mind to allow it to shift towards more peaceful emotions.
When she finds herself on the verge of catastrophizing and imagining worst-case scenarios, Vermani tries to flip the script by replacing a negative thought with a more accurate and adaptive one.
To put this into practice, Perlus likes to remind herself of her strengths — and she leads with those. She knows that she’s a good listener, so in situations in which she anticipates conflict or is worried about getting her point across, she focuses on that skill rather than the possible battle ahead.
“When I lead with a strength, I’m giving myself the best opportunity to feel confident. Confidence tends to reduce anxiety and help me lead with my best foot forward,” Perlus says.
Saltz says that much of her stress relates to “anticipatory anxiety,” rather than the day or event itself. So when she notices anticipatory anxiety creeping up, she lets her inner circle know that she needs extra support.
“This will literally relieve the burden of any tasks that need to be completed while also emotionally making me feel lighter mentally and emotionally,” Saltz says.
Vermani surrounds herself with people and resources that can help manage her stress levels, coach her through negative thought patterns, and help reconceptualize seeing the good amongst the bad. And yes, those people include her own mental health care team.
Sandiford echoes that sentiment, adding, “Therapists need therapy, so I connect with someone who can help me process all of my feelings in an environment where I feel validated and supported.”